"Look what I can do!"

Sometimes when you start a new group experience (a class, a committee, a...anything else that could possibly start with C that I can't think of in this moment), the person in charge will have you introduce yourself. And usually it's with just a few pieces of information. For instance, in a college class, you might be asked to say your name, where you're from, and your major. Almost inevitably, you will also be asked to share either A) your most embarrassing moment or 2) something unusual about you.

Frankly, I hate these experiences. I have no problem sharing my name or where I'm from or any information like that, but embarrassing moments and unusual things are hard for me, because I never have any. I don't get embarrassed easily and I'm really quite boring, so I never know what to say. Also, for all my verbal ability, it's the first thing to go under stress, and being the center of attention is always stressful for me.

Ergo, a while back when I seemed to encounter lots of these sorts of situations, I decided I needed to make a mental list of things to say, so I would be prepared. In no particular order, here are some random facts/skills/quirks about my person:

• I am horrifically near-sighted (without correction, my range of vision is about eight inches.)
• I have no feeling on the inside of the big toe on my left foot.
• I dislike talking on the phone, even if I am talking to someone I am fond of.
• I can read almost anything in a Latin-based language-at least enough to get the general idea.
• I don't like wearing shoes, and really don't like wearing socks.
• I am driven to near-homicidal rages by thoroughly stupid things.
• I frequently feel pain, taste food and read in dreams.
• I can put on makeup with either hand and without a mirror. (Recently discovered skill, this one!)
• I give excellent gifts.
• I read about 750 words a minute, depending on the material, and I read every word, but five or six at a time.
• I can put an entire cupcake in my mouth at once. (Also various other foodstuffs: a muffin, a piece of cake, a slice of pie or pizza, an apple fritter, and probably some other things I have yet to attempt.)
• I have never had a cast, been hospitalized, had surgery or worn braces.
• I also have my tonsils, my appendix and all four of my wisdom teeth.
• I like almost all vegetables but not many fruits.
• I tear up easily but I don't cry much.
• I hate (as in positively refuse to eat) black licorice, Canadian bacon, pretty much all fruit-flavored candies and absolutely LOATHE peaches.